towards truth.

funny how when you just decide
the clouds part
the weight lifts
maybe no less pain,
just different pain

the pain that comes with the acceptance
of what is real
what is true
and thus what cannot be
at least not in this here and now

disappointment,
somehow much less heavy than denial
and somehow,
always gratitude
for the joy,
for the excitement
for yet another opportunity
to view the world from a new lens

strange how within the inherent black and white
of a truth uncovered,
there is so much gray
gratitude and disappointment
pain and joy
strange how the only truth
is that it can all exist
in the same here and now

somehow in accepting
that it’s all not so cut and dry
i then find something real,
a truth to grasp
that is no less nebulous than the fantasy
and yet because it is truth
is the ultimate source of grounding

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